Friday, November 5, 2010

Noone Knew


Noone Knew




Noone knew.

When my heart had broken into shards,

When my heart was aching so very hard

That I could hardly stand it,

And I hurt from the hair down.


Noone knew.

Because I could still walk,

And I could talk,

And I could say, “Fine” when anyone asked.

But they didn't know me well enough to see what was behind my eyes,

So noone knew.


But you knew.

And you cared about me, I could see that in your eyes.

You didn't invade my privacy with questions

Or unnecessary words,

But I bet you prayed for me,

Because you knew.

And you cared for me

As a good friend would do.


You knew.


And you were a good friend.


So I'm telling you now...

Thank you.


~klm~

© 2002



(This is not a new poem, but it is a real poem. I wrote it years ago. I am sharing it here, responding to L.L. Barkat at http://www.thehighcalling.org/ . We are looking at a specific poetic tool, called the catalog technique. Honestly, I am not sure if this is a good example of this. This repetition is something I use a lot, almost automatically sometimes. I use repetition here not only in the repetition of the main phrase throughout the poem, but also with parts of lines repeated in the first two sections. I remember my dad talking this way sometimes, when he was serious and really wanted me to hear what he was telling me. It reminded me of a preacher, this repeating of a part of a phrase, not in poetry, but in speaking. Maybe his using it with me makes this repetition for emphasis or contrast come naturally to me. But I never knew it had a name, and I'm not sure if what I am doing here is exactly what the catalogue technique is about. Regardless, I write to unload my heart, and the styles and techniques just work themselves out, for better or worse. Please hear my heart when you read this. )

4 comments:

  1. Oh the pain of hurting from the hair down...
    Thanks for sharing.
    Kath

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  2. it's really good. made me cry. i think i get that from you. ;) (jk)

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  3. The "no one knew" repetition serves to emphasize the isolation. That works.

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  4. Thanks, everyone, for your comments. Yes, it was a time of deep hurt, Kath. Made me cry too, Bess. But it got better. Thanks, LL for the constructive help. You all are helpful with your comments. I appreciate them.

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Thanks,I love your comments!